Imagine a place where all the laws and taboos that have been ingrained into your mind since adulthood don’t apply. Better yet, imagine this place actually exists and is just short plane journey away. No, I’m not talking about Pinocchio’s Pleasure Island, I’m talking about Amsterdam.

To be fair, despite its reputation, there is far more to Amsterdam than prostitution, sex shops and lax drug laws. In fact, unless you spend your whole time in the red light district, you could quite easily visit the city and never encounter such things. Then again, there’s no harm in looking…

We arrived at Amsterdam’s international airport on a glorious sunny morning and quickly made our way to the city centre by train. For those of you planning a trip, the train runs regularly between the city and airport and you can buy your tickets from either the counter or, provided you have the correct change, the self-service machines. Either way, the journey takes about 15 minutes and you soon find yourself standing outside Amsterdam Central Station.

After completing the mandatory tourist map fumbling, we decided to make our way down Damrak road towards Dam Square. On the way we made the customary detour into the infamous Amsterdam Sex Museum, a collection of porn, sex toys and dodgy art. Despite what we’d heard, we didn’t find anything particularly shocking inside and the exhibits where all pretty dated. That said, the entry fee is pretty cheap and it’s definitely worth visiting for a giggle.

Anyway, we soon arrived at our intended destination, Dam Square, the true centre of the city and home to the neoclassical Royal Palace, National Monument and Madame Tussaud’s wax museum. It’s the type of place where street performers do their thing and pigeons peck for scraps. It’s also a photographers wet dream and we spent quite a while taking photographs of the amazing architecture that borders the area. Thankfully, due to its shape and location, Dam Square is also an excellent place to get your bearings and decide how you intend to tackle the main attractions. Talking of attractions, below are some of the highlights:

Anne Frank Museum [Official Site]
Possibly the most famous attraction in Amsterdam, Miss Frank certainly needs no introduction and I’m sure anyone reading this is fully aware of her tragic life. The Museum itself, which is located inside the actual building where Anne and her family hid, is not as foreboding as one may imagine. In fact, the whole place seems very normal which, when you think about it, is probably what made it such an excellent hiding place. Either way, it is powerful stuff and there really is no excuse not to visit. The owners are a bit cautious of people taking large bags and backpacks in so, if possible, leave them at the hotel.

Vincent Van Gogh Museum [Official Site]
The museum chronicles the life and the psychological decent of the famous painter, exploring the factors that influenced his unique style. Whilst I’m not really a fan of his work, the museum was able to hold my attention and I would definitely recommend it to anyone with even the slightest interest in art. Highlights include The Potato Eaters, Bedroom in Arles and one of the three Sunflowers paintings with a yellow background.

Heineken Experience [Official Site]
Next up was the Heineken “museum” where we learnt how great Heineken is, why we should buy Heineken, why we should drink Heineken and how good Heineken is. As you have probably guessed, I’m not a fan of consumer products masquerading as culture, so I treat these experience as what they are – disposable fun. However, as much as I hate to admit it, the Heineken Experience was pretty good and, if you have time to spare, it’s worth popping along. They have a range of interactive exhibits including a DJ table, computer quizzes and free beer. Don’t get too excited, however, as you are only entitled to two pints.

The Canals
In addition to running between attractions, we also spent a few hours just walking the 17th Century canals that cut through city. You can rent a bike but, since the distances weren’t vast, we just did it on foot. Whilst I’m not normally that interested in architecture, the decorative houses that line the streets are really nice and, if you’re anything like me, you’ll be reaching for your camera on more than one occasion.

Red Light District
Once the sun had set we made our way to the red light district. The set-up is pretty simple: woman stands in window - man negotiates services – man and woman have sex. Aside from a few shifty characters, the area feels fairly safe and there appeared to be a reasonable police presence. At the end of the day, the whole area is one of Amsterdam’s biggest attractions and, as you would imagine, the authorities like to keep the place as respectable as sex district can be. The rooms the girls work in are very minimal affairs and consist of a bed, mirror and sink. A word of advice: don’t try and take pictures of the girls – they don’t like it.

Street Entertainment
If you hang around Dam Square for more than a few minutes, chances are you will end up watching one of the many street entertainers that perform around the area. Acts vary but most are of a very high standard. As always, if you watch a show be prepared to hand over some money.

Whilst he is not a regular, we did catch a glimpse of Dub FX, a beatboxer that travels across the world demonstrating his skills. It’s very hard to describe his unique sound so I think it is best to draw your attention to a video of his antics. However, for those that don’t have time to watch, he uses a loop station to record vocal sounds, manipulate them and create amazing and catchy tunes. He is also an excellent singer and, combined with his catchy beats, he really is a pleasure to watch. We also bought a copy of his CD for 5 euros – bargain!

Albert Cuyp Market
Operating from Monday to Saturday, Albert Cuyp is Amsterdam’s largest open air market. You can find most things on sale here including clothing, food and tourist souvenirs. Whether you buy anything or not, it makes for a really nice stroll.

Of course, there is far more to Amsterdam than key attractions and, as with any city, half the fun is exploring the place. We found the tram network to be very efficient and, since they’re still quite rare in England, quite a novelty. As I previously mentioned, it is possible to hire a bike and, to some extent, I regret not doing this. However, regardless of how you choose to get around, Amsterdam is a genuinely nice place with an even nicer atmosphere.

Hopefully we will return to the Netherlands in the not too distant future.

Costs (4 Days)

Flights: £160
The whole trip was a last minute idea and, as such, we couldn’t book tickets early. You could normally get 2 return tickets for about 120, less if you look hard.
Hotel: £0.00 (3 nights)
We used the Couch Surfing website to find someone to host us for free. This type of travelling isn’t for everyone but it sure keeps costs down.
Getting around: £??
We only ever used the tram network which is dead cheap. However, I didn’t keep track of exactly how much we spent on transport so this is included in the “All other costs” section below.
All other costs (food, attractions etc): £300
We did splash out a bit on food and attractions were sometimes a bit pricey.

Total: £460.00 (£230 each)

This was a birthday trip so we didn’t want to be too stingy. The free accommodation really kept prices down.

Categories: Europe
Tags: Dublin, Netherlands